Hate It When...

  1. You have to try on a pair of sunglasses with that stupid little plastic thing in the middle of them.
  2. The elevator stops on every floor and nobody gets on.
  3. You open a can of soup, and the lid falls in.
  4. There's a dog in the neighborhood that barks at EVERYTHING.
  5. You can never put anything back in a box the way it came.
  6. Three hours and three meetings after lunch you look in the mirror and discover a piece of parsley stuck to your front tooth.
  7. You slice your tongue licking an envelope.
  8. Your tire gauge lets out half the air while you're trying to get a reading.
  9. A station comes in brilliantly when you're standing near the radio but buzzes, drifts and spits every time you move away.
  10. There are always one or two ice cubes that won't pop out of the tray.
  11. You wash a garment with a tissue in the pocket and your entire laundry comes out covered with lint.
  12. The car behind you blasts its horn because you let a pedestrian finish crossing.
  13. A piece of foil candy wrapper makes electrical contact with your filling.
  14. You set the alarm on your digital clock for 7pm instead of 7am.
  15. The radio station doesn't tell you who sang that song.
  16. You rub on hand cream and can't turn the bathroom doorknob to get out.
  17. People behind you on a supermarket line dash ahead of you to a counter just opening up.
  18. Your glasses slide off your ears when you perspire.
  19. You can't look up the correct spelling of a word in the dictionary because you don't know how to spell it.
  20. You have to inform five different sales people in the same store that you're just browsing.
  21. You had that pen in your hand only a second ago, and now you can't find it.
  22. You reach under the table to pick something off the floor and smash your head on the way up.