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Correct Definitions

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ABSENT MINDED PERSON
One who stands in front of the mirror for hours trying to remember where he has seen the person before.

LECTURE
An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either."

OPPORTUNISTS
One who starts having a bath when he/she accidentally falls in a river.

CONFERENCE
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

COMPROMISE
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

LOVE AFFAIRS
Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.

TEARS
The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

DICTIONARY
A place where divorce comes before marriage.

CIGARETTE
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool on the other.

CONFERENCE ROOM
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.