The Advantages of Being Plump!
  1. You don't need as much water to fill your bath tub.
  2. You are easy to spot in a crowd You don't have to buy your clothes in the department with loud rock music.
  3. No one expects you to win the local marathon, or even enter.
  4. You don't get many wrinkles No one challenges you to play leap frog You don't have sharp edges You will last longer than a thin person if you are ever lost in the wilderness without food (possibly the only diet not tried yet).
  5. You float better Your soft shoulder is perfect for a baby to nestle into.
  6. Your ring has more gold in it You automatically get your fair share of the bed (the covers are another matter).
  7. You are never the one who has to squeeze behind the table in a crowded restaurant.
  8. You can win at musical chairs (especially if you play with tiny cowards).
  9. You never have to worry about whether you are getting to old to wear a bikini You have more value, when you are worth your weight in gold.
  10. Your toboggan goes faster, once you get it started.
  11. You get the arms on both sides of your theater seat.
  12. There is just more of you to love.